AUGUST 10, 2007 @ 7:55 pm – NB 405 Fwy at Century Blvd

Just freaking great, stuck in Friday evening rush hour near LAX. It's my fault I suppose since I wasn't able to get away from work before 4 pm like I usually do on Fridays.

This time our Highway A-hole of note was a serial tailgater. Nice new Dodge Charger R/T, red with black ralley stripes. The driver was non-descript due to the heavily tinted side and rear windows.

We were just inching along N from Orange County to the 110 Interchange. There the traffic lightened up to a point we could all move pretty much the speed limit. The Charger A-hole was really riding up close on the bumper of a silver Cooper Mini. The driver of the Mini was a yuppie looking programmer type, probably a TRW, Boeing or Northrup-Grumann employee (I've seen my fill of these people). He seemed to be staring straight ahead and driving very intently. He probably already noted the tailgating Charger behind him.

Now this Charger was really right up on the Mini. Not just I-need-to-get-by-you close, but more of if-you-hit-your-brakes-our-cars-will-be-having-sex close. The Charger was right on the Mini's butt until we got to Century Blvd. There traffic started to slow to a crawl once again. The Mini has already merged to the number 3 lane - it looks as if the Charger had done the same. The number 2 lane was clear and free for he Dodger to pass the Mini. Nothing doing, the Charger remained on the Mini's ass as I went ahead and passed both.

Really, this was nothing a little tap on the brake lights could have solved for the Mini.

JULY 26, 2007 @ 2:10 pm - SB 405 at Hwy 110

Soccer moms in mini vans suck... and not in the good way.

A nice warm day, good visibility too, you could easily make out the Palos Verde Peninsula off to the west. Traffic was breezing along pretty well as busy as the freeway was. And then it happened - the soccer mom from hell decided she was going to drive in the #1 fast lane. That in itself shouldn't be a problem, but she decided to drive 50 mph, not 67 as most of us were doing.

Two cars ahead of me I see the silver Toyota Sienna mini van, license tag 5CGU664, with a black grill bra strapped to its front end flapping in the wind. The van had stick figure stickers of a family of 5 next to a soccer ball in the rear back window. The white Toyota Tundra between us was right up on her bumper. I played it smart and kept a decent distance behind the truck. It seemed that as the Tundra got closer to the soccer mom's Sienna, the soccer mom would let off the gas, further reducing her already slow speed. The guy driving the Tundra was getting pissed and eventually passed her on the right flipping her off as he slowly passed her. I'm not sure if she saw his gesture of love.

I slowly crept ahead and behind the soccer mom, but not to close. I sensed that she may not know there are people trying to pass her. I nudged over off center left so that my day running lights would hit her mirrors. She never glanced back. She was down to 50 mph again while traffic in the #2 lane to her right was doing at least 60+.

By Carson blvd I decided that I was done trying to get her to move over. I passed her on the left after I merged into the #2 lane. As I sped up to meet the traffic flow at 65 mph, it seemed as if she was driving much slower now that the 50 mph before. As I passed her, I saw the reason why she was oblivious to the traffic around her. She had her head down towards her steering wheel and she was thumb-banging a Blackberry. Blackberry use while driving a car should be illegal.

JULY 14, 2007 @ 3:35 pm - SB 101 Fwy at White Oak Blvd Off-ramp

Maybe someone out there can tell me... exactly what is the maximum limit height a driver can stack broken down cardboard boxes in the back bed of a 1985 Toyota mini pick-up? I would think no higher than the cab of the truck would be prudent.

Today I see this truck, faded blue in color with no license plate, driving in the number two lane of traffic traveling no faster than 45 mph. The flattened cardboard boxes stacked in the bed were piled above the truck bed to a point about 6 feet above the top of the cab. The towering layered stack was semi-secured with motorcycle tie-down straps hap-hazardly attached to the cleats bolted on the outside of the bed. The excess strapping material was flapping in the wind.

As I drove behind the truck, I could tell that at any moment this pile of cardboard was about to fall off the truck. I hastened passing the truck as a precaution to not being involved in any foreseeable accident should the load shift and spill on the highway. As I passed and look back in my rearview mirror, I see the cardboard stack severly waver from my passing draft. This caused the truck to waiver as well. It almost looked as if the truck was about to roll up on two wheels on one side, like one of those Joey Cheetwood Stunt Show tricks. I also see that there are 4 workers sitting in the front seat of the truck. Inside the front license plate frame was a white and green "Chivas" embossed vanity plate.

The driver obviously had no brains. He was laughing at something between himself and the others in the truck. I doubt there were 4 sets of seatbelts in the truck for all the passengers and driver. I further doubt the truck, and driver, were insured. I have absolutely no doubt that the truck was being piloted by a Highway A-Hole.